Eugene Mirman’s Application for “Cupid”
Height: 6000-inches (aproximately two earth years) Nicknames: Ace and Dr. Bathroom Name of Employer: United League of Underwater Nations Position Held: Surgeon General of a Place I Made-up Do you drink alcohol?: YES! If so, how often: Once a day, for 8 hours Where do you usually meet women: In hotels or the street Do you enjoy dating: NO! What is the most romantic thing you've done for a girlfriend? Shot a dog that was attacking her. What's the most adventurous date you've ever arranged for a woman? An expedition to the center of the earth. What do you want out of your next relationship with a woman?: POWER! List the qualities you find most attractive in a woman: TELEVISION! Describe your ideal woman. From the mountains, is new to technology, and thinks I am MAGIC! Why would a woman have fun on a date with you?: I would let her punch me. How important is sex to you in a relationship? Not at all in the first few minutes. Then, CRUCIAL over the next 20. What do women find most attractive about you?: I AM FAST AT SEX! Do you have a strategy for standing out in a crowd?: KARATE! Describe situations where you have treated a girlfriend in a way you regret. I once killed my girlfriend's dog.
New Versions of the Web
I wish I could could claim this as my own, but this one comes from infamous footballer, Gabriel Jones. This is what we in the business refer to as “pure genius”.
Web 2.0 — you know it, you got it –> basically junk
Web 3.5 — all 5 senses enabled via appropriate tech software and hardware
Web 4.0 — all 5 senses enabled to viewer, plus virtual intimacy (with bouncer present of course)
Web 6.0 — 6 senses enabled to viewer, plus virtual intimacy (no bouncer present) and ability to see dead people
Notepad Bug!
It has been discovered that Notepad has a bug. If you open a file using the program. Then, type in a four letter word, two three letter words, and a five letter word. After saving the file and reopening it, the text is garbled. Some combinations of words reveal the bug, others don’t. One example is “this app can break”. This fondly reminded me of John Hargrave’s infinitely excellent Notepad Rap circa 1999.
Karl Pilkington, The Funniest Man Alive
I can’t stop laughing at this guy. He tells the most absurd stories as if they were undisputable fact. His diary entries contain the most peculiar observations about his daily life like “Went to the beach today. Saw a fat man in the water with a T-shirt on. Asked Suzanne if fat people have to worry about burning more because they have more skin exposed to the Sun. She said she didn’t know in that I-don’t-care-kind-of-way.” And great one off observations like, “If we didn’t invent the aeroplane, we’d have grown wings by now”. Truly genius. Anyone know where I can download episodes 1-7 of the Podcast as they appear to be unavailable from iTunes and the Guardian Unlimited site.
I AM A PRIME NUMBER!
Last night, I was at Wally’s with 
mitya000 and bartonbowers. mitya000 picks up the order signs off the table, numbers 11 and 12, and proceeds to make them have a conversation as The Plutonians from ATHF. Here is that conversation:
Order #11: ‘Ja I am eleven, I am ze prine number!
Order #12: I AM TWELVE, Ja, I am De-VIS-a-BULL by tree!
I don’t know why I find this funny.
Bittorrent
So, this guy downloads an rar file from a torrent, unpacks the rar, executes the resultant exe, and it’s Bittorrent’s fault? I’d blame the network card or electricity, personally.
Fedora Core 4 / TBC at Alamo
It seems that Fedora Core 4 has gone gold, and is available if you know where to look. I just burned off a DVD iso, and plan on installing it this weekend as a staging server. I may end-up putting this at the involution.com colo for backup and redundancy once I figure everything out. Also on the agenda for this weekend, I’m going to see The Brothers Chap (creators of Homestar Runner) at the Alamo Draft House downtown on Saturday night with The Bart
Homestar Runner RSS Feed
Some geezah managed to put up a Homestar Runner RSS Feed here 
. It’s pretty neat how it works by using perl to screen scrape the site periodically.
Modesto Linkin’ Bonanza
Bumper is taking an innovative approach to dealing with hotlinkers by updating a couple of images grokked by the Modesto Junior College Criminal Justice Page. I’ve petitioned him to have Sterrance/Rendoggle Day, and I think he’s going to do it given enough pressure from the blogging community.
